Neglected

...that’s what this blog is at the moment. Between the breastfeeding, diaper changing (and washing…), and the craziness of renovating our house (one wall at the time…) and just living, it’s just not at the top of my priority list. I felt a strange urge to just delete this whole blog (and start another one…*sigh*), but I’m going to give it another chance. I have a long history of starting new projects and not finishing or keeping up, so maybe I’ll just accept that I cannot write a post every day or even weekly at the moment. It’s just how it is, but it still is. I also felt like writing in Norwegian again, because sometimes writing in English takes a bit longer and I catch my self using it as another excuse to neglect this blog…

But here we are. Or I am at least.

I just came back from the library with two books that I’m expecting quite a lot from. They are both in the category I ironically describe as “things I don’t want to know” – as in “ignorance is bliss”. One is written by a Norwegian educationalist, researcher and writer; Erik Sigsgaard and is called “Kjeft Mindre – Historier om oppdragelse”, or in English… something like Yell/scold Less – Stories about upbringing”. I have a 5yo and I have a bad temper. Nuf’ said. I need that book.

The other one is written by a Danish family who turned their life around completely after living many years on a bad diet and a life full of toxins and chemicals. They have raised quite a stir in Denmark and a bit of discussion in Norway as well with their books and advice about food. Basically they recommend a diet free of milk, gluten, sugar, “fast” carbohydrates and artificial stuff/E-numbers/food additives among other things. Their book is called “Kjernesunn Familie” in Norwegian. Kjerne = Core. Sunn = Healthy. Familie = Family. You get the picture. I need this book as well. We need it. Too much pasta, too much additives, sugar and stuff that really does no good to our health either physically or mentally.

Driving home with T. (the 5yo) this evening; “mama, I want ice cream”! Me – trying to explain why she cannot have ice cream every day. She – having a total breakdown in the backseat because of it; not giving a damn (pardon the French) about my logic explanations of course. So I stopped at the grocery store and bought some fruit and we went home and made our own ice cream. Version one – Black currants from the garden, a dash of organic soy milk and a teaspoon or two of xylitol ("Bjørkesøt" -instead of sugar; made from the birch tree). Version two – Banana and soy milk. Version three – mango. They are in the freezer at the moment. Quite an experiment. I hope she likes it – at least she enjoyed making them.

And I’m making “jam”;- soaking organic dried apricots. Tomorrow I’ll probably boil them for a few seconds, and then throw them in the blender. Voilá – organic apricot jam – no sugar. Did you know that most “conventional” dried apricots are treated with sulphur to keep the colour orange? Buy organic brown apricots. Apricots do not stay orange when they’re dried…



PS. I just love the library. What an amazing public service. Libraries make me happy, and proud and humble somehow.

My view

My 5 year olds view of me.

My level of crunchiness is significantly higher then most people I know. At least in my family – not much crunch there. Sometimes I feel lonely because my beliefs, thoughts and actions are so different from many of the people around me. I have friends that I feel totally at ease with; I feel at home and I can let my guard down and just completely be me. The first time this really happened was when I met other pagans. It’s the ultimate cliché, but I felt that I had come home. But when I am with my family (not the immediate family like my husband and my girls of course), distant relatives or friends, and even with strangers, - there are big parts of me that would never dare to peek out of the dark and dusty closet.

Not that I always and at all times have to show off all parts of my personality and discuss all the things I believe in or think about! We all wear different masks in different situations and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. But sometimes being/feeling different is lonely; like living on another planet or in a culture that is totally strange to you. And sometimes it is exhausting to defend your thoughts and actions to people that don’t (and really don’t want to) understand where you’re coming from.

But then again there are times when proclaiming your view is both giving and energizing…

There are positive aspects to this. Most of the time (luckily) I feel proud and completely at peace with my beliefs and thoughts. What I miss are more people to share them with. Commuity. Americans are great when it comes to everything “community” – at least is seems like it from my point of view. I was asking my husband the other day if he would like to move to the US or the UK for a year – just to try it out. To get closer to communities that has the same values and interests that we do. He wasn’t put off by the idea.

But we will still be the same people, just in a different environment. Will that change anything? I know that spending time with equals gives me a lot of positive energy and happiness, but still?